The Ugly Outfit Contest

There's this thing the hipsters do - especially the ones in my neighborhood - where they pretend to be poor. They purposely seek out and wear the ugliest, oldest clothes they can find in what seems like an attempt to capture an authenticity that's missing from the rest of their lives.

Most of these people are kids in their 20's from middle to upper class families who still get financial help from their parents. To them, being poor is an adventure! It's artistic! It might even be a statement about anti-consumerism!  What they're failing to realize is that the way they dress is extremely classist. It's their own critique of what poor people look like - some caricature inspired by an amalgam of Annie and Oliver Twist.

Incidentally, I live in a hipster mecca - a neighborhood located just outside a low-income area serving as a harbinger of death-by-gentrification. If I walk four blocks down, I'll find myself in the middle of a housing project. When I take that walk, I am surrounded by low-income families and teen moms.

Here's a fun fact:

Do you know who isn't trying to look poor? Actual poor people.

The people that live in the housing project put effort into accessorizing and assembling outfits that reflect the latest fashion trends. The women wear makeup and jewelry and style their hair, sometimes really elaborately. Men wear hats and flashy sneakers and name brand jeans. They all smell good because they all shower everyday. You know why? Because poor people are just like everyone else. They want to be attractive. They did not wake up this morning and say to themselves, "Shit, I'm still poor! Guess I better put on my chimney-sweep hat and see if there's a baggy, floral patterned button-up from the 80's in the dumpster."

Sadly, the middle class kids in my neighborhood haven't received that memo. Instead they got the memo that told them to go to the thrift store and buy a pair of used, high-waisted soccer mom jeans so they can cut the legs off and fashion them into The World's Ugliest Shorts.